Heena Modi

I think things like this are cool! Like the famous one where some people see a young beautiful lady and others see an old, tired looking woman.

Anyway here they are

11 ships, 3 ships or 8 arches?

Faces or houses?

Can you see 7 horses?

Whole bodied people or just faces?

Is it a ring?

A picture or a puzzle?

How many people can you see?

Look at the middle column. Where does it end?

How many deer can you see?

Can you see 4 people?

Who is the tallest?

A face or a word?

The word could be read as liar if you see it.

Can you see the word lift?

Gutted! We planned to go an exhibition today. We said we’d go out and have lunch, and then go to the exhibition at 2 p.m. This would give us plenty of time as it closed at 5 p.m.

What happened in reality was that my friend needed a haircut. He didn’t really factor it in or tell me about it so we didn’t get to the exhibition until about 4:00 p.m. The man that was staffing it needed to close early so we were asked to leave at 4:40 p.m. No treat in terms of lunch. Exhibition not completed! Disappointment.

There are so many things that people don’t have, yet I’m bothered about this. Well…it’s all about expectation of course! I’d wanted to go and see it for over 2 weeks, when will I go now? etc. etc. etc.

Then comes the comparison. When my mate wants to do something he makes sure it happens. I try and make sure I don’t let him down. If something means a lot to him I’ll make sure I attend. This goes for my close friends in general actually, not just this one!

So this time it was something I wanted to do, something I planned, something I was looking forward to! But it didn’t happen. The thing is, I don’t usually have any preferences re doing stuff. I don’t usually get my hopes up about doing specific things. Also after you remove the things I struggle to do because of my back, there’s less choice anyway and then; I just don’t mind! The day you do then want something, you expect it to happen because you usually don’t express a preference! It doesn’t work that way does it?

So it’s better to not want, to not hope, to not expect. Then you can’t be disappointed right?

Can you think of any other examples of expectations that most of us have?

• Others saying thanks for things that we do. Should we expect it or just accept it if it’s given?
• Punctuality
• Gifts for certain occasions and not just any old gift, it has to be to a specific standard or be worth a certain amount
• For friends and family to be pro-active if something is wrong with their health. Find out what it is, ask questions, and seek treatment.
• To pass exams
• To speak quietly
• To speak slowly
• To give me a lift
• To keep your shoes off seats on the tube
• To eat with your mouth closed
• To eat quietly
• To throw your gum in the bin
• To invite me if you celebrate
• To understand

Humans are so complex and want so much. Do we make our own lives difficult?

This is a message from the researcher, Bindi.

The research is on young Jains (18-30 year olds) who have been born and/or brought up in the UK or USA. The kinds of things I am interested in learning about are:

a) how are young Jains interpreting Jainsim and what kind of religious practices are they involved in? How might these be different to their parents’ generation?

b) what kinds of organisations or networks are young Jains building and what are the goals of these organisations/networks?

c) Do young Jains translate the principle of ‘Ahimsa’ into wider concerns in society, such as non-violent solutions to conflict, concern for the environment, promoting vegetarianism, sustainable living, etc. If so, how do they do this?

I am looking for people who would be interested in participating in the research. Interviews generally take an hour to hour and a half. And I can meet at a time, day, and location that is convenient for you.

Please contact me via email at B.Shah@roehampton.ac.uk

Bindi

Harrow have many temporary exhibitions scheduled. I have been to two an they have been excellent! Easy to understand. Visual, Good size of text. No judgement or bias shown and great content. I went to the Tudor one. It was called ‘Off with their heads! The Harrow of Henry VIII’ and it was all of the above. I forgot to say their exhibitions are child friendly too.

The second one that I went to see is called ‘Connections: Hidden British Histories’

It’s on from 3 November - 15 December 2008 and here’s what Harrow has to say about it: -

This exhibition looks at the history of Asian, Black and Jewish immigrants to Britain. It focuses on the relationships between them, their shared experiences, and the connections they have made.

I urge you to try and go before it closes. You could of course write to them and ask them to show it again or keep it on for longer.

Here’s an article that was printed in the Harrow Observer: -

Learning lessons from our community’s hidden history

Harrow Museum is launching an exhibition exploring the history of Asian, Black and Jewish immigrants to Britain called Connections: Hidden British Histories.

Personal stories and photographs are used to show how people from minority communities interacted in their new environments while the history of Asian, Black and Jewish food, music, literature and comedy is also explored.

The exhibition challenges the stereotypes of ethnic minorities and will allow the visitors to question their own identity, home and family history, bringing in their own personal experiences of immigration.

Visitors to the free museum at Headstone Manor, Pinner View, Harrow, can drop by on weekdays, excluding Tuesdays, between noon and 5pm and at weekends and bank holidays between 10.30am and 5pm from Monday, November 3, and Monday, December 15.

The display was originally developed in 1998 when the Jewish Council for Racial Equality, the Asian-Black-Jewish

Forum and the Parkes Institute for the study of Jewish/non-Jewish relations at Southampton University launched a major history project into the hidden relations of people from ethnic or faith minorities.

Visitors can look at the way the authors have researched the history of inter-ethnic minorities. There are positive stories of co-operation and learning as well as tales of the problems faced such as tension, prejudice and competition between minority groups.

The reality of the ignorance of people living in diverse cities, with minority groups not knowing anything about each others’ ethnicities, is explored.

The exhibition is the first comparative approach to the history of immigration in Britain and challenges the misconception of relationships between different communities.

Connections: Hidden British Histories is an ideal opportunity to bring people from different communities together, available for everyone from young people and adults.

Museum mangager Lottie Collins says: “This exhibition is very relevant to our community in Harrow, as we are such an ethnically diverse area.”

Oct 30 2008 Rebecca Perring, Harrow Observer

This was sent to me by Verity who works at the Vegan Society. I specifically asked about where I could buy dairy free cheese and vegan sausages. Thus she sent me this list.
Mail Order Suppliers List for Vegan Goods

Here’s some info about Glaucoma from the 100 Black Men of London newsletter.

To mark the 60th anniversary of the arrival of the MV Empire Windrush in Britain in 1948, this exhibition tells some of the the personal stories of the Black men and women who were involved in the First and Second World Wars.

Among the exhibits on display are the MBE belonging to Sam King, who returned to Britain on the Windrush after serving in the RAF and subsequently served as the first Black mayor of Southwark, and the telegram announcing the death of Walter Tull, the first Black British Army officer.

The exhibition runs through to March 2009 and will be accompanied by a series of monthly lectures, held in conjunction with the 100BMOL, which will provide the opportunity to explore and discuss various related topics including:

(a) loyalty within the British Empire and what it means to fight for ‘your’ country,

(b) Britain’s use of propaganda in Caribbean recruitment and the anti-Black propaganda employed by the Nazi regime,

(c) the Black victims of Nazi persecution before and during the Second World War, and

(d) an examination of the American presence in the Caribbean and the influence of US segregation policies on Britain.

There are also a series of family events linked to the exhibition. Admission is free.
Imperial War Museum, Lambeth Road, London SE1 6HZ. For more information see From War to Windrush

This is a quite an odd one for me.

In some ways, those who have died are more important than those who are alive. “Huh” I hear you say. Not ‘anyone’ but for example, those who we look up to in terms of increasing our spiritual awareness. In this case, they are more important (in my view), than us ‘mere mortals’ who need guiding. I do appreciate that this isn’t everyone’s view. For those of you who share this view, I get that we all have different levels of spiritual awareness too.

In another way, those who are alive are important. We may live with them, see them a lot, learn from them, guide them etc. Thus we may need to take their views and needs into account.

In another way you could say we should give importance to those who have died. We should perhaps try to fulfil their wishes as they cannot do so themselves.

I’m not sure where we would draw the line? Would it be when it suited us? Would we try and do as much as possible and end up living for the deceased or as if we were in their presence?

For example, I’ve had a few car accidents and I know that if my dad was alive he probably wouldn’t have wanted me to get in a car again. He may have even tried to chauffeur me around or possibly arrange for cabs to do the same. Who knows? So if I did what suited me I would ignore knowing that he would prefer that.

However, my mum would want me to be independent. To be able to get from A to B. To be able to help others out if need be in terms of getting them where they need to be. To be able to get to work in 10 minutes by car, instead of 1 1/2 hours by London Transport. So when do her wishes supersede what my dad may have wished? And vice versa?

What do I adhere to and why? Because it suits me? Because I believe in that more? Because I get it more?  Why?

My aunt has passed away and she was very anti having a big event for anything. So should her children not have a big wedding for that reason? Does it suit to not do that? Would you ensure you followed it so that she can be remembered during the ’small event’ e.g. “Aunt Shashi would have loved this”

What about her sister who took over the care of aunt Shashi’s children? She is alive and she wants to see them married off with a huge wedding. Do we ignore the wishes of the living? In this case, what makes the deceased more important? What makes the living more important? Or is it not about that at all? Is it about the people in the relationship? This example, of course, could apply to birthday parties, moving home etc. Do you keep it small or do you celebrate in a big way?

What do you do?

I am fortunate in that my mother hasn’t ever said to me your dad would have wanted this or he would have not wanted this. I know I would have got caught up in the guilt, been confused, possibly been cross about the situation, implications and then who knows what conclusion I would have come to. It’s all very difficult isn’t it? In my eyes it’s not clear or easy.

What do you think?

This is quite a personal post. I debated whether to write it or not but something feels right about it so here I go!

Recently my uncle’s mum passed away. I felt blessed to support them. No offence intended but I didn’t know her very well, so when I was thinking about attending the funeral I was only thinking about my role in supporting my family and not about how if could affect me.

The thing is, I got quite wound up before we got there because, in my mind, we were late! I thought of many reasons why this was an issue but I’m not sure they were accurate.

Anyway we went inside and I sat near my family. Various people gave speeches, we prayed etc. and then it was time to press the button for the coffin to be taken to the back where it is cremated. I saw my uncle’s face and I remember what I felt when my father passed away. I had been very tearful but now it was worse! You see it was all in my subconscious. I hadn’t consciously realised that I hadn’t been to Golders Green Crematorium since my father passed away! I’d attended 2/3 other funerals but they were in Hendon, Leicester or Luton so although I was affected by the experience, it wasn’t AS bad.

You see when my dad passed away I spoke to those who came and then I was told to press this button. I didn’t know what it was for! When the coffin started moving all I wanted to do was run and stop it. I had so many thoughts going through my head. I had to be strong for my mum. It would unsettle the audience if I ran over to my dad’s body. Could I stop it in time? I should just remain calm and go through it.

Anyway it disappeared and my mum and her friend said that I should go to where dad’s body will be cremated. Usually it’s the men who go but because I’m the only child, they said I should go. This was the same re when we brought the coffin in. They said I should go and help bring it in. ‘After all you’re the son and daughter.’

Sorry I’ve gone off track. When I was at my uncle’s mum’s funeral I couldn’t stop crying. After it finished I held it together so that I could leave. However, they’d announced that those who travelled far and the immediate family should come to the house and have some food. When I was outside my mum said I could come and it would be OK. In my head I justified not going because they wouldn’t have catered for so many people and they said that only immediate family and those who travelled far should attend. I was neither. So I left but I was so uptight in the car. I just needed to be somewhere safe where I could let go.

Once I did let go I couldn’t stop. Suraj helped me realise that it was because of the venue! He knew I’d been to other funerals since my dad passed away so he asked if I’d been to Golders Green Crematorium. Of course that was it! I hadn’t been there since 2000! Since dad’s funeral.

Isn’t it amazing how subconscious the mind can be? How important a place can be and how if can affect the way you feel! Anyway that’s it! I’m not sure what you’ll get from this but it is what it is.

Take care
Heena

Does it matter whether records show that you’re Hindu, Jain, Muslim or other?

Some members of our community have complained that we cannot obtain grants to help members of the Jain community because the bodies that offer the grants are not convinced that there are many of us in the UK.

When we request for Jainism to be taught on the Religious Education curriculum we are told that it’s not necessary as there are very few of us.

When we ask for a Jain chaplain in hospitals, it seems that we are asking a lot for a miniscule number of the population.

Why do various organisations think there aren’t many Jains in the UK?

If you are Jain do you do the following?

When you fill out a job application form and you are asked to describe your religion do you tick ‘other’ and write Jain there?
When you fill out a form because you are a patient at a hospital and you are asked to describe your religion do you tick ‘other’ and write Jain there?
When you fill join a GP or dental surgery do you tick ‘other’ and write Jain there?
If you complete a benefit form do you describe your religion do you tick ‘other’ and write Jain there?

There are so many opportunities to highlight Jainism. This will help us gather statistics, obtain grants and raise awareness about our needs.

Here’s what I did. I went to the website that allows patients to leave an opinion and I wrote a few words asking why Jainism isn’t listed as a faith. Have a look at what I wrote. Could you do something similar? http://www.patientopinion.org.uk/opinion.aspx?opinionID=13838

I also went to http://www.writetothem.com/ typed in my postcode and clicked on write to all MP’s/Counsellors. I sent one message to all of them asking the same question. Here’s one of the replies that I received.

Dear Heena,

….My office has spoken to the Department of Health regarding your query about Jainism’s inclusion on their list of faith options.  We were informed that due to practical reasons, the list that the Department of Health uses includes only the most common religions in the United Kingdom based on statistical data.  They have informed me that there is a space in which patients can write in their religion if it is not included on the list.  If you are not satisfied with this answer could I suggest that you write to the Secretary of State for Health who is the Rt Hon. Alan Johnson MP. He can be contacted at: Department of Health, Richmond House, 79 Whitehall, London SW1A 2NS.

Regards,
Syed

SYED KAMALL
Conservative MEP for London
www.syedkamall.com
syed.kamall@europarl.europa.eu

We can make a difference.
We can create positive change.

What do you want for YOUR children.

Let us look at the amazing technology that’s been introduced in the last decade. That which has grown and its usage increased so much that the effects on our culture are vast!

British Telecom predicted that people would start working from home with the aid of fax machines, laptops, access to the internet, email and so on. Nobody knew that the number of people changing the existing working culture would be so great. Alright so all of this incredible technology saves us time, money, time travelling and effort but at what COST?

Lets take the Internet. There are so many pluses. Having encyclopaedias on screen, being able to send messages at the cost of a local call or for a monthly one off fee, being able to do searches on various subjects for school (and work) projects. Fabulous!

So what do we have to lose? A child can type in the word sex and call up all sorts of porn. He or she may MEAN gender but will get porn never the less. He or she may have to do a project on Amsterdam for Geography but if he or she types that in they could get something they didn’t bargain for. Do we want our children being exposed to this sort of thing? I for one know that I don’t want this for my future children. But what can we do to ensure we get what we want. (Assuming that you agree with me).

Do we not want to have the use of the Internet in a way that’s suitable for children WITHOUT the parents having to stand over them and ensure they don’t get a surprise.

Can we not campaign and as a result, gain some control of what goes out on the Internet, be empowered to have things removed from the net if need be?

There has been on and off publicity about the Internet and porn for quite a few years now! Has there been any progress in terms of capping this activity? What do you think? Is it better?

There are also ways of seeing abuse LIVE over the Internet and the so called snuff movies which are supposed to end in the ‘viewer’ seeing a child die. This has been of great concern because the children’s identities are more often than not unknown and bodies haven’t been found, thus the perpetrators of this violence are not being caught. There is the added confusion re whether they’re ‘faked deaths’ or not. What can the Police do?

Why are service providers not stopping this kind of material from go out? It has been argued that it is because a lot of their customers who are interested in porn are the big spenders. They don’t want them to move on to another Internet Server so they keep allowing it.

Are these providers sacrificing the innocence of our children and the children of our future?

Something parents may need to know? I’m sure these terms are out of date now but do you know them?

ASL ~ Age, sex & location
POS ~ parent over shoulder

Did you know that webcams can mean that you or your child are exposed to nude pictures that can be sent via chat rooms & email?

I am NOT advocating banning the internet. However, as adults we need to make sure that we protect children by using safe providers, installing filters & most of all giving children the skill to know what is right and wrong, safe and dangerous and empower them to make decisions that are good for them. What do you think?