What do you express more? Shame or pride?

by Heena Modi on July 28, 2015

Can you name some relationships in which you feel emotion?

Does that sound weird? We feel emotions all the time don’t we? I believe that there are some relationships in which we feel emotions more intensely than others. Then there are those, where we can hide, suppress or nullify pretty much, any sense of emotion.

The thing is…we don’t all feel the same level of emotion, in the same types of relationship. For example, some people are very emotional about their siblings, others aren’t. Let’s list some relationships.

  • parent and child
  • siblings
  • student to teacher
  • niece or nephew and uncle or aunt
  • cousins
  • spouse
  • partner
  • shopkeeper
  • the owner or employee of our favourite local business
  • employee and boss
  • patient and doctor
  • grandchild and grandparent
  • childhood friend
  • work colleague

There are so many, aren’t there? This list isn’t exclusive, so there will be many which have been left out of this list.

Why is emotion important?

Try and think of one relationship where you notice what the other person does and you usually have an opinion about it. When they behave ‘well’, (according to your expectations), do you feel a sense of pride? Do you like the type of person they are? Do you want to see or experience more of it? When they do things that you think are beneath them, an action that results in them letting themselves, or others down; do you feel anger, shame or some other form of dislike?

Do you think these emotions remain hidden as long as they’re not expressed verbally?

What do you focus on, or notice, more?

Are you the type of person who notices what you like more than the things you dislike? Or are you more in tune with things that you don’t like to witness?

Depending on the type of person you are, it’s possible that you’ll express what you notice more in some way. Whatever you hold on to, usually finds a way to come through, one way or another. Whether it’s your body language, facial expressions, a sigh, the words you use etc.

Why does what you notice matter?

Your outlook has a lot of power. It has the power to uplift yourself and others, or it has the ability to dampen your mood and have a negative impact on others.

For example, if you nearly always notice, feel negative about, and disapprove of, the things your child does or says, do you think they’ll embed the feeling that you are proud of them, or will they think you’re mostly ashamed of them? In the same way, does your partner make you feel as if they are proud of who you are, or as if you are a thorn in their side? I’ve only used two examples, but I think they can be applied to any type of relationship.

The choice is ours and it’s not too late to change our outlook

I know of adults who aren’t sure if their parents were ever proud of them or not, because the ‘child’ sensed that they were constantly letting their parent down, or that their parents nearly always saw them as being, not good enough. Some relationships can’t be turned around and this might be because all parties may not be alive any more. However, where there’s determination and motivation, it’s never too late to change the way we perceive situations, the things we focus on, and the memories and feelings that we hold on to.

An opportunity to reflect, evaluate and develop

Are you in a similar position to me?
Do you need to change the way you view certain people?
Like me, do you also need a shift in perspective with certain types of situations?

How will you make that empowering, compassionate, and feel good shift?

What will you put in place to see things differently? When you see something you dislike in someone else, can you use it as an opportunity to identify your own shortcomings? Could it be the catalyst for you to encourage yourself to remember something they consistently do, which you admire? In order to remind yourself that people can change for the better, could you think back and recall something (negative) that you used to do, or a way that you used to be, which you’ve now remedied?

If you can think of any other strategies, do get in touch and share them.

Hope for Horses UK

by Heena Modi on July 9, 2015

Can you imagine someone investing in a horse and then leaving it for dead?

I met Mark Johnson a few months ago. He started the campaign, Hope for Horses UK in February 2014. I was quite shocked to find out that someone would buy horses, leave them in a land that’s not fit for purpose, breed them and disregard the horses that get in to trouble. They were pretty much viewed as disposable!

You can see an example of this in the photo below. This horse was stuck and left to die! She was named ‘Hope’ and it was her rescue from which the campaign Hope for Horses came about! Mark and other volunteers tried to help free her, but she had been left overnight and become far too weak to survive.

cropped-hope-32

Find out more here http://hopeforhorses.co.uk/our-work/how-it-all-started/

Who is behind the campaign Hope for Horses?

Hope for Horses is a campaign group which is working towards UK animal welfare law for equines being implemented and enforced. You might wonder why this is needed. If there’s a law, it would be followed and if not, the relevant authority would be able to penalise and punish those breaking the policy. Right? This is NOT the case! Unfortunately, horses in the UK horses are protected by animal welfare laws, which clearly make neglect a criminal offence, but the law is rarely enforced and thousands of horses suffer and die because of neglectful owners.

Hope for Horses have found that the number of equines paying the price for over-breeding, collapsing prices and rising costs; is on the increase!

What type of campaign strategy are Hope for Horses using?

The campaign is peaceful but determined.
The group is using strategies, such as, protesting, petitioning and persistently applying pressure on the agencies involved.

Click here to read the Hope for Horse’s timeline of events

What does Hope for Horses want to achieve?

  • their goal is for the Government to ensure that local authorities fully enforce the law, when horses are at risk
  • they want the police to investigate cases of neglect
  • they believe that and the local Trading Standards should be involved
  • action must be swift
  • further suffering must be prevent suffering
  • those who own the horses should be prosecuted if they have neglected or abandoned horses that are under their care

In this short video, Mark Johnson introduces about the campaign Hope for Horses UK

Is this maltreatment and disregard for horses a problem that only exists in Leicester?

The problem is all over the UK, so each and every council needs to identify and deliver a workable protocol to address cases of neglect and maltreatment. They cannot do it alone. The police, across all areas of the UK, need to support the action that needs to be taken when these cases arise. In addition to this, welfare agencies, such as, the RSPCA and local/national horse sanctuaries have a place in ensuring that problems of neglect are resolved and prevented.

What can you do?

  1. Visit http://hopeforhorses.co.uk/our-petition/ to download a petition or a petition pack
  2. Help create a lobby group to enter Parliament – find out more here
  3. Write to your MP
  4. Emailing Downing Street directly using https://email.number10.gov.uk/ – more information here
  5. Like and share the page on facebook
  6. Buy their merchandise from which they don’t make any profit
  7. Attend a protest – you’ll find information about future protests here
  8. Make a donation to a horse sanctuaries and rescue/re-homing centre
  9. Re-home a horse or pony
  10. If you are worried about a horse you have seen, please visit http://hopeforhorses.co.uk/worried-about-a-horse/ to be guided about what to do

Here’s a short clip, in which, Mark Johnson talks about some of the things you can do to help

Find out why I created the eBook ‘The Way to a Vegan’s Heart’

2 July 2015

My first ever eBook So I have some news… I created and launched an eBook, called The Way to a Vegan’s Heart: Delicious Recipes to Help You Eat Well, Cook Quickly and Feel Content. For those of you who are vegan or interested in cooking vegan meals for yourself, or vegan friends and family; this book […]

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Does every moment present us with a choice between heartbreak and liberation?

16 June 2015

If you could choose between heartbreak or liberation, which would you choose? Comparing how someone interacts with us and others Can you recall a time when you saw someone whom you like, admire or love, show more affection to someone other than you? Perhaps you saw them treat someone else better? Did they speak to them […]

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Seema McArdle’s views on racism, homophobia, Islamophobia and xenophobia

7 May 2015

I attended the National Union of Teachers conference this year was delighted to hear Seema McArdle speak up for groups who are being negatively labelled, victimised and unfairly punished! Her message definitely deserved the standing ovation which followed! Below you’ll find a slightly edited version of her speech. It’s SO worth reading! Our media and MPs […]

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The thief that steals from us all the time and we don’t even bat an eyelid about it

15 April 2015

What do we do to PREVENT thieves from stealing our things? We put locks on doors We add locks to windows We install a home alarm and service it annually We ensure that we’ve turned the alarm on when we leave the home We add tracking devices to our car We set a complicated security […]

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Does what you see, bother you? Do you let it linger in your mind?

15 March 2015

Moving home, unpacking and procrastinating We moved home in 2013 and although it’s now March 2015; there are 2 boxes, which still haven’t been unpacked. I have noticed them but avoided going through the contents! Whose job is it and why hasn’t it been done? In my mind, both of the boxes had stuff in it, which […]

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